Friday, April 25, 2014

A CLASS IN NICK BUJNAK’S MIND

Oh God there’s two seats open where do I go? Bianca keeps asking me to sit next to her. Why does she keep repeating my name? Spoonjak? Come on Bianca it’s not sophomore year. I’ll just sit next to Ben. Sorry Bianca. Now there’s prom talk from the girls. Ugh, I can’t wait for this to be over. I guess class is actually starting. I’m typing loudly sorry everyone in the class. There’s a seat open next to me I bet Mrs. Gill sits there. I was right. Abby is walking in. Should I make the same joke as Will? Yeah, I’ve done it before. (Steals Will’s joke). Oh we’re reading scribe notes. Man, I hope mine are funnier than these. Carly, why would you mention that no one reads? It’s just going to piss off Mrs. Gill. I was right again. Wow she actually said those exact words. Here comes the lecture. All I hear her saying is ‘text’. Text text text text review the text love the text read the text study the text text text text text text. Why must she repeat that word so much? Did Courtney just ask which class Mrs. Gill likes more? Teachers must hate that question.
-          “That’s a hard question”

Nice dodge Mrs. Gill. We all know that they hate all of us equally. Uh oh we’re talking about the book now. I hope she doesn’t ask me if I read. Crap. Well now that she called me out I can just scribe for the rest of the class. Wait, Ben thinks this book is boring? Shocker. I guess we’re talking about Buttercup now. This discussion is all over the place. Oh God everyone is talking at once I can’t type fast enough. I guess the general consensus is that we like Buttercup. Mmm Buttercup or Peanut buttercup. I need a Reese’s. Shoot wasn’t paying attention. What the heck is Will drawing? “Horse is my ‘mane’ man”. Is it possible to cringe everywhere on your body? I’m pretty sure the only one in this room that genuinely laughed at that was Sarah. I’m actually friends with these people (just kidding Will and Sarah <3). Oh Mrs. Gill please tell me you’re joking about not understanding it. She wasn’t kidding. Time for the daily update on Ben’s facial hair. There it is. Uh oh sneeze coming on. That was so loud and gross. Wow Will is really the only one who says “Bless you”? Great to see I have people who care about my health in this room. Mrs. Gill must you make Lindsay read this four page passage out loud? How am I supposed to scribe about this? I guess this is going okay, people are actually following along for once. Aaaaaand there it goes. I bet Chris is the first one with his head down. Dang I was wrong, looks like Will is the first one defeated. Wow his face is really far in that book. Oh God this is moving so slow I think I can actually feel myself dying slowly. HOW ARE THERE STILL TWO PAGES LEFT? Is Lindsay putting herself to sleep by reading? Is that possible? What time is it? TWENTY MINUTES OF CLASS LEFT? Okay these scribe notes are getting a little ridiculous. I think it’s time to stop. Better brag about how long they are though. This is going to take forever to edit tonight but let’s be honest I’ll wait until the last minute anyways. 

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